Dumb in Alabama

847 words. Commentary.

In her column of May 21 (“Yoga is another one of those dumb-in-Alabama stories”), Frances Coleman spent the first three paragraphs declaring her love for Alabama before getting to her real point: that other Alabamians are dumb. Her column was not even condescending—it was just plain insulting. The writer disingenuously describes Alabamians’ objections to the teaching of Yoga’s cultural and spiritual elements as though those objections are solely the product of ignorance and fear of otherness. She laments the fact that our poor dumb doings are likely to draw ridicule from that bastion of clear thinking, The New York Times. Our nationally-recognized dumbness is enough to make one say “quelle horreur” (which means “aw shucks” in French, for my dumb readers).

Will you join me in a thought experiment? Einstein set aside math and used thought experiments to explain relativity, and no one called him dumb, so I have high hopes for us…lesser minds.

First, though, let’s look at the definition of yoga in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. That dictionary, by the way, was started by Northerners and was later acquired by Encyclopaedia Britannica, who spell it with an “ae”, so it is presumably not tainted by Southern dumbness. There are two definitions. Yoga with a capital “Y” is “a Hindu theistic philosophy teaching the suppression of all activity of body, mind, and will in order that the self may realize its distinction from them and attain liberation.” Lesser minds might summarize that as “sit down and shut up and you might get to go out for recess” but I would never do that, for I have an actual serious point: the words “theistic philosophy” mean “a system of beliefs based on the existence of one God viewed as the creative source of the human race and the world who transcends yet is immanent in the world.” That’s from those Merriam-Webster chaps again.

Heads up: here comes the thought experiment.

Suppose you lived in a time and place where skirmishes in a decades-long cultural and legal war to eradicate theistic philosophies from government institutions in general, and from schools in particular, were still going on around you. The war has focused on Christianity since that has historically been the majority faith in the United States and its lessons and holidays naturally became commingled with not only the general culture but also the schools. It has taken a crowbar and innumerable court cases to accomplish even a partial separation of church and state, and there are still eruptions over the utterance of the words “God” and “Amen” and “Merry Christmas” on school property or even off campus if school sponsorship is involved. By and large, though, the separation is well under way and there is no shortage of watchdogs on duty to keep it rolling.

Now, into that pristine religion-free clean room, some folks want to introduce, without restriction, a practice that is closely tied with a Hindu theistic philosophy?

Which brings us to the second definition, this time of yoga with a lower-case ”y”. My boys M&W define it as “a system of physical postures, breathing techniques, and sometimes meditation derived from Yoga [capital “Y”] but often practiced independently especially in Western cultures to promote physical and emotional well-being.” Nowhere do they mention the pants, but that’s another story.

So, it appears that yoga with a small “y” is derived from Yoga with a big “Y” or, to use elements of the actual definitions, a system of postures and meditation is derived from a Hindu theistic philosophy.

Call me dumb, but I can see where someone who has lived through the culture and legal wars to eradicate one theistic philosophy from the schools might have their sensors on high alert for the introduction of other theistic philosophies into the very same schools. Even younger folks who didn’t live through the worst of the legal battles might learn the history and might think honestly about the issue and grant both sides the courtesy of an attempt to understand their opinions without resorting to name-calling. And I know this is a stretch, but even a former editorial page editor might drop the fear of Northern ridicule long enough to honestly examine the issue in full context.

We have seen that the notion of practicing the physical elements independently from the spiritual elements is baked right into the smart-person-approved definitions. The supposedly dumb thing that the Alabama politicians have done is say that they are on board with lower-case yoga, but not upper-case Yoga, being taught to the children in the public schools. I think that is an eminently reasonable and good-hearted stance, for it shows a willingness to find an accommodation that might benefit the children. Open-mindedness with reasonable constraints—it almost seems like an intellectual process was happening there…nah! They are dumb!

Sometimes, even smart people don’t know when they have won, or how to gracefully accept their victory. And quite often, the same people who lament the divisiveness in our society are awfully quick to carelessly apply unkind labels to others.

Namaste, y’all.

Amen.

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